8 Habits That Make People Respect You

The character Tommy Shelby from Peaky Blinders exemplifies quiet charisma and commanding respect through specific behavioral patterns. While fictional, the psychology behind his demeanor offers practical strategies for real-life interactions. The following eight habits distill his approach to projecting confidence and authority.

Slow, Relaxed Movements

Tommy Shelby rarely appears rushed, even in high-stress situations. He moves with deliberate slowness and ease, signaling that he feels no fear or pressure. This deliberate pace conveys an air of superiority and control, suggesting that he is above being intimidated.

In practice, slowing down your movements when facing challenges projects self-assurance. Instead of reacting hastily, take a moment to breathe and collect yourself. This physical calmness instantly commands respect by demonstrating that you are unphased by external chaos.

Commanding respect like Tommy Shelby requires mastering emotional control, non-verbal presence, and communication. It is about exuding quiet authority—staying calm under pressure, moving deliberately, and speaking with absolute intent—rather than trying to dominate or shout.

Habit	Description	10 Concrete Examples
1. Stay Calm in Chaos	Remaining level-headed and unfazed when things go wrong to project strength and clear logic.	• Not raising your voice during a heated argument with a partner. • Taking a deep breath before reacting to a sudden drop in company revenue. • Listening without panic when a contractor breaks bad news about a home renovation.
2. Speak with Intent	Choosing words carefully and avoiding unnecessary filler to ensure every statement carries weight.	• Pausing before answering a tough question during a job interview. • Saying “I will have this done by Tuesday” instead of “I hope to get to it by Tuesday.” • Removing words like “um” or “like” from your professional presentations.
3. Claim Your Space	Using body language—like a wide, grounded stance and relaxed posture—to comfortably take up room.	• Resting your arms comfortably on the armrests of a conference table. • Standing with your feet firmly planted rather than shifting your weight nervously. • Sitting with your legs slightly uncrossed in a relaxed, open position.
4. Master Eye Contact	Holding a steady gaze without appearing aggressive, and knowing exactly when to look away to defuse tension.	• Maintaining steady eye contact when asking your boss for a raise. • Glancing briefly to the side to reduce intensity if a meeting gets highly emotional. • Holding someone’s gaze when thanking them for their time instead of looking at the floor.
5. Move Deliberately	Moving at a slow, relaxed pace, signaling to others that you do not feel rushed, pressured, or threatened.	• Walking into a crowded room at a steady pace rather than rushing. • Pouring a glass of water slowly while listening to a colleague’s pitch. • Not checking your phone every few minutes when sitting in a waiting area.
6. Hold Your Attention	Forcing others to focus on your rhythm rather than allowing external distractions to hijack your attention.	• Setting your phone facedown and completely out of sight during a 1-on-1 meeting. • Continuing a point calmly when someone interrupts you, pausing for them to finish before continuing. • Focusing entirely on the person speaking without looking around the room.
7. Maintain Standards	Holding yourself and others to high benchmarks, and refusing to tolerate disrespect, laziness, or disloyalty.	• Politely but firmly asking a team member to redo subpar work. • Not tolerating a “friend” who routinely disrespects your time or boundaries. • Showing up on time to every meeting, expecting the same punctuality from your peers.
8. Think Strategically	Planning several steps ahead and being prepared for various outcomes so you are never caught off guard.	• Preparing solutions for potential roadblocks before presenting a new project idea. • Having a backup plan if a client meeting gets canceled or changed. • Considering how a current decision will impact your goals a year from now.

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